my missionary journal

Missionary Journal – June 4, 1989

Day 5 of my full-time mission
Area: Missionary Training Center, Provo, Utah

It’s 8 p.m. now. I’ve had a very long day — too long. It’s the sabbath and I should be really feeling the spirit, but right now, I’m not. Sacrament meeting was good but these big conference meetings are tiring.

I’m kind of missing home and what I felt secure with. I really need to pray tonight to get a good feeling back.

Well, now I’ve got another class: gospel doctrine. I hope it’s better than last time.

The class was much better. I did feel the spirit again today. Man, why do I get grumpy? I had just woken up from a nap then and I was upset. I really don’t know why. Boy, do I need the Lord’s blessing. I need to be charitable to others. I need to learn instant love. I need to have my testimony reconfirmed while I’m here. It’s not that I don’t have one, it’s just that it should and could be stronger.

Today I make a goal to be more spiritual by reading in the Book of Mormon each day and praying with all my heart after I read to know of its truthfulness.

I do love the Lord and am anxious to bring the light of his gospel to others’ lives. It’s just that my life needs to get a little better first.

I know I can do it!

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