Day 16 of my full-time mission
Area: Missionary Training Center, Provo, Utah

I got my first package today! Right before dinner, I got a plate of cookies from two West Side Story friends from the Y! Isn’t that nice?! But they didn’t give me their address to write to them.

We, as a district, in class this morning had a three-hour discussion about the tensions that have built-up. In case you couldn’t tell from yesterday, the spirit wasn’t that strong anymore. Anyway, we talked about all our concerns and cleared them all up.

In the process, girlfriends came up and suddenly, like a Mack Truck, I realized what a jerk I had been to Laura. I just started to cry and everyone patiently listened to my story. I committed to write her a letter and tell her how I felt. It boils down to this: I miss her. I feel like any possibility of marriage has been ruined, but I still love her. So I told her and ask her to please write so I could let my feelings rest while I was out here for two years.

If she says things are over, then I guess that’s it. But I don’t feel like she will. I’ll find out in a month or so. I really wrote her a sincere letter. It was inspired and should definitely, if nothing else, let her know I’m happy to be on a mission and I’ll always serve my Heavenly Father.

My scripture: 2 Nephi 9:28-29 — To be learned is good if they hearken to the counsels of God